Isn't that a deadly sin?

I feel sloth-ish. I'm pretty sure that's one of the seven deadly sins. You see, I can't seem to motivate myself to do something creative. I have a lot of creative energy, but I can't decide how to spend it, and I am afriad of failure. I hate having something in my mind's eye, then getting distracted, and messing the whole thing up. I can't do that to myself... I get frustrated if I fail- to the point that I am really disgusted with myself. I start believing I have no talent, and then I have no inspiration. Which, by the way, is much worse than having no way to get rid of it.
I keep watching "Miami Ink", and this tattooist, Kat Von D is so amazing! She does incredible B&W tatts. What I really love though is how skillfully she does pinups-- something I strive to be good at, but fail miserably on. That's why I got so excited about my airbrush, because a lot of artists use airbrush for their pinups. But I'm determined to get at least half-way decent at it. Maybe I need to take a portrait drawing class at Ringling this summer. I'm sure my problem is simply proportion of the face. I have lost my skill of portraiture, and it is very sad. :(
Above anything else, I MUST CLEAN MY ROOM!!! Alas, I have no time. When can i do it? Monday, Wensday, Friday I go to school. Tuesday and Thursday I am working on homework and online gym class. (They really need to offer P.E. and Personal Fitness during the summer....) On the weekends, I try to spend time with Stefan if I'm not working! I am just screwed I guess. Next week: Momma is going to Tampa on Thursday, so I'll probably go with her, even though I have to work. Friday, no school, and no work. So I'm thinking of taking off Thursday too, and just cleaning my room on Friday. But see, I want to spend time with Stefan, so that might put a damper on cleaning plans. I have to clean it all in one day, because if I don't, I just end up getting uninspired, which leads to not really caring, which leads to an even bigger mess. BLAH!!! Now do you see my predicament?!

Anyway, that's all ther is for now kiddies. Until next time...